Ellie Vs. Subjectivity

Dear creatures with a pink squishy organ at the top of them that makes ideas,

First off, I apologize, because yesterday I was going to write this post, then got distracted with whatever it was that caught my attention. I thought I had saved this to my drafts so that I could remember to write it for today, but turns out I published an empty post. What a n00b move! as you can see, this post is not empty, so I hope you will continue reading.

Also yesterday, I spent all my spoons (if you don’t understand this reference, click here at some point) vigorously cleaning my apartment so that it would be bright and shiny for a little family get together tonight, consisting of my boyfriend’s grandmothers and their family friends. As I was cleaning, I was listening to Demolicious, the demo album of Green Day, one of my all time favorite bands. As I cleaned and sang along to the rough first versions of some of my favorite songs, my mind began to drift.

At first I thought of how many of my friends adore the band as much as I do, and how we happily feed our obsession together. Then I thought about how many people I’ve met who absolutely despise the very same band, which is probably near equal to those who are on my side of the situation.

And then I had a revelation that I’ve had hundreds of times in my life, yet regardless of how frequently it comes, it never ceases to grab me, sending my mind spiraling as it zooms in and out of my entire existence. I stopped scrubbing my window sills, put the sponge down, washed my hands, and proceeded to compose an open letter to humanity, which I posted to Facebook ( I know, I know, this was all so deep until that last part. Just stick with me). My letter went as follows:

Thought: Isn’t it neat how someone can listen to my favorite band and think, “wow, this is one of the best things I have ever heard in my life!” and then another person can listen to the exact same music and think, “wow, I hate this, and this is absolute shit.”

We don’t often think about it often because surely our brains would pop, but most of what we experience in life is entirely subjective. Two people could live identical lives and come out entirely different, while two vastly different humans can have more in common than one would ever think possible.

It’s intimidating to think about, because it means that most of what we know to be truth is probably not true. Then we have sciences such as astronomy, which through means above my own comprehension tell us that whether or not you like it, the sun shines, the ocean moves, and we are made of the same chemicals that everything else in existence is comprised of, regardless of any difference. We are all one magnificent, large ecosystem, from the freckles on my cheek to the rings of Saturn.

I suppose the only way to truly navigate all that without going insane is to believe in your truths, because after all, whether or not it is proven to be truth, it is dear to you. And I think that’s alright as long as it isn’t harmful to others, though even the definition of harm is subjective. I believe though it is difficult, you can both hold your own truths close while respecting and learning of others, because in the end, all we really know is what we experience, which is why continually learning is so valuable to a human life.

Being a person is so interesting, isn’t it?

I then continued cleaning through my home until I was finally able to stop and fall over on my couch to have a lunch of Sriracha turkey meatballs and french fries. Through the rest of the day, I kept busy with all that I had to accomplish, all the while still thinking about this concept.

As a human being I believe that we are constantly striving for evidence that answers the “why”s of our existence. Collectively we have done a pretty fantastic job of finding our answers, and a tremendous amount of work from billions of people through hundreds of years have all contributed to this; so, when I tell you that most of what we believe is probably not true, that’s kind of fucking terrifying. Like, Five Nights At Freddy’s doesn’t even come close to how terrifying this is.

As I said in my letter to no one and everyone, truth is mostly subjective. There are some things that are objective, such as the facts that the stars are made of gases or that the Earth is round (shut up, the Earth is ROUND). No matter where you come from, or even if you angrily and firmly disagree with these facts, both the facts and I don’t particularly care, because they’re going to be true no matter how much you hate them.

As for the rest of everything, no matter how much you argue, defend, and believe in something, there really is no definite truth. And if that really is the case, how are we to even function?

Well, I have no answer for that. The only thing that I have that could be regarded as sort of an answer is that while I do believe in all this, I also believe in sort of baseline rules for humanity. These are rules that I find to be stripped of all opinion, culture, religion, gender, sexuality, and all other outside factors, that 99% of humanity can probably agree on. This includes rules such as hey, don’t shoot someone in the face just because you feel like it, or you can’t just walk into someone’s home and say, “this is mine now, shove off.” I would like to think we can all agree on rules like that, and yet almost every day we hear of people who don’t even agree to those rules! Isn’t that nuts?! It’s a little nuts.

Long, long ago, about five paragraphs back, I finish the open letter off by saying,

I suppose the only way to truly navigate all that without going insane is to believe in your truths, because after all, whether or not it is proven to be truth, it is dear to you. And I think that’s alright as long as it isn’t harmful to others, though even the definition of harm is subjective. I believe though it is difficult, you can both hold your own truths close while respecting and learning of others, because in the end, all we really know is what we experience, which is why continually learning is so valuable to a human life.

I honestly believe that this really is the only way to thrive as a human being. What we experience is all we know, and all we have to base our thoughts on. If that is the case, open mindedness, education, and an infinite amount of discovery in daily life are the most precious attributes a life can have. The more one opens themselves up to constantly learning, while they may not find the definite truth for a particular matter, I do think it brings them much closer. Remaining ignorant only brings one farther. If you spend a life looking for the truth, while you may never find it, the adventure you experience on that journey will be what your life adds up to.

All you have is what you know, and your faith. And when I say faith, that doesn’t only pertain to religion, it pertains to having trust in anything, whether that is your religion, your friends, or yourself. Believe me when I tell you that faith can certainly be tested when you are a person who is chronically ill such as myself, or when you are abused. Human beings are the product of our experiences, our travels, and our relationships. Everything that we do in life, from talking to a cashier at a store for five seconds or moving to live in a different country for two years impacts us, affects our truth, and ultimately creates us.

My political science teacher back in college told me that his political science teacher even farther back told him that one person’s freedom of speech ends where another’s nose begins. That means that people are allowed to have freedom as long as it doesn’t impede upon another’s. At first I thought that was simply put; however, considering the idea of harm and freedom are subjective themselves, that actually doesn’t clarify anything. Well, it does to me, but since I am sure there are some would disagree, I can’t say that it makes sense to everyone.

At the end of it all, no matter who you are or what you believe to be truth, the most ultimate truth that will never, ever change is that we are all the same. We are all made of  the same celestial concoction, we are all living on this beautiful little speck that floats through the infinity of space. And as more human beings accept and embrace this overall truth that rules us, whether anyone likes it or not, it will bring us closer than ever to not only understanding, but to genuine happiness lead by raw compassion and love.

My favorite band is probably not the most amazing band in the world, but they are to me. If you disagree, that’s okay too; though disagreeing about things and being a giant bag of dicks about disagreeing are two totally different things. If we are to experience all the best and worst parts of life, we’d be better off going through it all, together.

Here’s to more love, understanding, and compassion, and to less bags of dicks.

Juliet’s crying, cause now she’s realizing love can be
Filled with pain and distrust.
I know I am crazy, and a bit lazy,
But I will try to bring you up again somehow.

‘Cause I’m losing what’s left of my dignity.
A small price I’ll pay to see that you’re happy.
Forget all the disappointments you have faced,
Open up your worried world and let me in.

~One for the Razorbacks – Green Day

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One thought on “Ellie Vs. Subjectivity

  1. It is very hard sometimes to make truths that you in doubt of your reality, when the truths that you doubt are your truths that make your reality yours to begin with. If that makes much sense… but yeah, I completely agree, it is necessary to try to understand, make sense of what is going on, and live your world out.

    Liked by 1 person

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